Just relax, i'm going to rip out pieces of your vagina.

I went for my Colposcopy today. Things weren't as good as they could have been and we'll have to wait a week to see if they are as bad as they could be. Between now and then I have to try and keep my mind off of it. Riiiight.

So, I'm in the office, feet in stirrups and my husband grabs my hand. The doctor explained the procedure-- 'we put vinegar on your cervix. if you have abnormal cells, they will turn white. we'll biopsy any white spots to check for cancer. it could be bad... it could be nothing'

For a moment, I wondered how they dispose of samples once they have been tested. Then I wondered how many pieces of me are floating around the universe... is there a baggie with a little bit of me in it hanging out in Russia? How would I know?

My husband thought this would be a good time to relieve some of my anxiety. "Woah, there's a lady checking out your whohoo with a telescope!"

We all laughed, we kept making jokes, then the cells turned white.

A few snips, some iodine and "mud cells" later, and I was ready to go. We did a little shopping and got some lunch. The retail therapy helped relieve the stress a bit. I bought some frames to put more of our pictures in and I added to Alyssa's new Precious Moments collection.

I have a minor shopping addiction that has kind of exploded since I gave birth. I'm really hoping that I can wean myself off shopping once Christmas passes. At least I'm getting good deals! I haven't paid more than half price for anything and I even got a pair of steel toed boots for $10.

No matter what other problems I have, I just remind myself that I have a wonderful, happy, healthy baby and then I realize that nothing else matters. I want her to stay that way.

She's even sleeping through the night a little! She's such an angel when she's asleep. I love cuddling with her... it makes everything better.